We spent the 4th of July by ourselves. The fireworks, the BBQ…just us.
Yesterday, we took the kids to the pool and swam together as a family, alone.
Tonight we met a tabby cat on our walk. Lizzie tried to get it to follow us home.
We are going to have friends here.
We just don’t have any right now.
I’m not creepy or needy. My kids know how to take turns. We always meet awesome folks everywhere we live. This town will be no exception.
But I’d forgotten how the first weeks feel in a new place. Anonymous. Lonely. By now, shouldn’t someone have stopped by with a Bundt cake? Maybe some cookies? I guess they don’t eat carbs here in Southern California.
It’s good for us, I think. This friend-less time will help my kids grow closer. I waffle between forcing them to play together and trolling the neighborhood looking for children on bicycles. Yesterday, I made small talk with a woman taking out her trash because I heard kids’ voices coming from the backyard. Okay, so maybe I’m a little creepy.
I’m usually the welcomer. I’m the one who bakes scones or pops over to see if the new folks need a bottle of wine. I guess that could seem nosey. I prefer to think of it as friendly.
After I struck out with the lady at the trashcan, I walked past a house with a SOLD sign in the front yard. In a few weeks, we won’t be the newest kids anymore.
Neighbors don’t have to be BFFs, but it doesn’t cost much to walk a few paces down the sidewalk. To let the newbies know that trash day is Tuesday, or that the city pool down the hill has family swim from 1-3pm.
The kids and I are already planning to welcome the new neighbors with some homemade lemonade. Here’s hoping we start a tradition.
2 replies on “New Kids on the Block”
Oh, this feeling is so familiar! Though we’ve been here a few months, I really have only two people to call for playdates (and one is out of town). With a baby sister who isn’t much of a playmate yet, my elder daughter has resorted to hollering out the window at passers by, in the hopes of making a connection.
As an introvert, I am slammed with the double whammy of being exhausted from the energy it takes to care for the wee folk all day that there isn’t much energy left for the necessary work of small talking my way into a friendship. So I skulk a bit too much on social media and quietly long for the easy friendships I have left behind thousands of miles away.
So…do you think that Ken can move the job just two states north? I swear I will buy a bundt pan to make you a cake if you come up here.
Oh, Sarah. You are the highlight of my morning. I know the friends happen. The meeting moms at the park. The kids who pop on over to play. I just forgot that it all takes months, not days. And in the mean time, yes, these are some long, desperate days. I really did try to woo my neighbor over a trashcan.
If only you had seen little Lizzie at her Free Lemonade Stand on Monday, screaming at passing cars and accosting the mailman. “Free Lemonade! Get your Free Lemonade!!” She and your M could get this friend stuff done for us in a jiffy. If only the wonder twins could unite.
I’m calling Ken about moving his business right now. I’m sure when I explain about the bundt pan, he will understand.
Until then, you are awesome, neighbor. Keep on keeping on.